The Four Important Roles Parents Must Play in Raising Good Children

All parents wish bright futures for their children. They want to raise well-behaved, respectful and moral children whose comport will help them advance far in society

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[ Feb 21st, 2012 ] - [ : 12099 ]
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Meditation for Peace
 
The Four Important Roles Parents Must Play
in Raising Good Children
 
Parents must teach children to discern what is right and wrong, and what they should and should not do.
 
Parents must teach children to discern what is right and wrong,
and what they should and should not do.
 
All parents wish bright futures for their children. They want to raise well-behaved, respectful and moral children whose comport will help them advance far in society. But in order to lay down the basic foundation for their success, parents must understand their roles in that development. In becoming good role models for their children, parents must understand their children’s personalities and be cognizant on how children’s attitudes and outlook change according to their age and environment.
 
When children are young, parents are everything for them. As they grow older, fiends will influence their thoughts and attitudes. In the teenage years, parents become less important to them. When they become adults they are independent  and must rely on  their own intelligence and reasoning. Throughout the children’s lives, it is necessary for parents to adjust themselves consistent to their children’s perspective.
 
In addition to being good parents and performing parental duties, they should also assume the following roles:
 
1. The role of a teacher.
 
Parents must teach children to discern what is right and wrong, and what they should and should not do. If your child is too young to learn about cause and effect, parents must then be good role models for them. The effort must be gentle and spoken with a warm tone. Do not teach them with a bad temper. Punishment should be utilized only when it is necessary. Cleanliness should be encouraged while the children are still very young by involving them in chores like washing clothes and cleaning. Regular bathing and clean eating habits should be taught early. Do not neglect these lessons or assume that they are insignificant.
 
Since parents are their children’s first teachers, they must instill what is right in their children so that it will be a foundation for their children’s good character. As the children grow up, this foundation will help them integrate good behavior into their natural habits. This will automatically steer them away from wrongful behavior.
 
2. The role of an angelic being.
 
Parents must have a solid foundation of Dhamma in order to assume this role. They must train their children to love merit and be fearful of sin. This can be accomplished by reading to them the Jataka 9stories of the past lives of the Lord Buddha), making sure they do their chanting before bed, and teaching them how to offer Dana (generosity) through methods such as offering alms to monks every morning. But most importantly, they must refrain from doing bad deeds for fear of the consequences that follow. Children will learn to refrain from bad action s based on their parents’ good example.
 

Parents must have a solid foundation of Dhamma in order to assume this role.

Parents must have a solid foundation of Dhamma in order to assume this role.
 
3. The role of a Brahma.
 
Parents must give loving kindness to their children by providing love and warmth. If the children make mistakes, parents must teach them about right and wrong and about forgiveness. When they perform good deeds, parents must praise and applaud them. Parents must provide them with an education and nurse them when they are sick. When they are grown and ready to leave the family to start their own lives, parents must accept their independence. We should still offer them advice, be their counsel, and give them encouragement.
 
Most importantly, parents must be neutral and not take their side if they have done something wrong. If children develop into law-breakers, they must be punished, even if this means jail time. Parents they must be punished, even if this means jail time. Parents must accept the punishment. Do not demonstrate your love for your children incorrectly by committing perjury. Parents can do as much as they can to help, but do not violate the law of the county.
 
4. The role of an Arahant.
 
Parents must practice as high a level of morality as possible so that they are well respected in society, as if they are Arahants of the household. They must be a wise counsel in the family and respected by their children and grandchildren. They must support making merits and the pursuit of the Perfections, maintain dignity, and preserve the family name. all the children in the family will respect and listen to them. The children will be afraid to do wrongful things both in front of and behind their parents’ backs.
 
Once parents are able to practice these four roles perfectly, family life will be joyful. There will be peace of body and mind which can expand from the well-balanced family to society and the country at large.
 

     
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