Remedying the Situation When Neighbors Fight

A good environment promotes good habits in children. But if our neighbors argue noisily every day while using profanity

Dhamma Articles > Meditation Articles and Techniques > Meditation for Peace
[ Mar 27th, 2012 ] - [ : 13146 ]
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Meditation for Peace
 
Remedying the Situation When Neighbors Fight
 
A good environment promotes good habits in children.
 
A good environment promotes good habits in children.
 
A good environment promotes good habits in children. But if our neighbors argue noisily every day while using profanity, how can parents remedy this situation? If our children continue to hear these arguments, they could be negatively impacted. This may lead our children to speak impolitely, offensively, and even be rejected by society.
 
There are two ways to address this situation.
 
1. Move away.
 
If parents are able, they should move away; but if they cannot, they must try to endure it. Parents can set good examples for their children by speaking politely with their neighbors. If parents take drastic actions, it may lead to a quarrel or personal injury. Such behavior will only create more problems.
 
2. Fight with kindness.
 
If the parents are younger than the neighbors, they should try to be friendlier. The neighbors may become more aware and argue more quietly.
 
However, if the parents are older, have stable careers, and are well respected in the neighborhood, they need to initiate dialogue with the neighbors. Before engaging in a conversation, the parents must be friendly and well-regarded by their neighbors.
 
People must be considerate of their community.
 
People must be considerate of their community.
 
What must you do to be friendly and respected?
 
1. A likable person is someone who is selfless and giving.
 
When a person shares his money or possessions with others, he is loved and appreciated. Even for us, when we receive something, we feel appreciated.
 
If we are able to help, then we should offer our assistance.
 
Even if we do not know what to offer, we can offer our support and encouragement with kind words. Even if we do not have anything to say, we can at least give a smile.
 
If parents behave appropriately toward their neighbors, they will be loved and respected. Then it may be appropriate for them to remind their neighbors of the neighbors’ behavior.
 
The Lord Buddha taught about the Four Bases of Social Solidarity (sangahavatthu). This refers to the principle of aiding people or developing a unified society. This Dhamma principle consists of:
 
1) Generosity (Dana) –This means the giving of material things.
2) Kind speech (Piyavaca) – This means speaking kindly and truthfully.
3) Useful conduat (Atthacariya) – This means being helpful to others, like helping at work when you can.
4) Even and impartial treatment (Samanattata) –This means being consistently friendly to everyone.
 
If parents are able to practice the Four Base of Social Solidarity, They will become highly regarded pundits. When there are conflicts, these parents can provide guidance. How they address them depends on the matter at hand. They can find solutions as a team.
 
2. People who can warn others about their behavior must observe the Precepts.
 
Only people who observe the Five Precepts are able to approach others about their behavior. When we can genuinely observe the Precepts, have good manners, and understand etheics, we will be capable of approaching and addressing a situation. If parents still lack virtues, then they should not approach others about their behavior.
 
People must be considerate of their community.
 
A person can maintain the affection and respect of others in several ways. The most effective way is by giving. When you give with a pure heart, people will love and look upon you with dignity.
 
The following method has been used in the past with great results. If is very easy. In the morning, grab a broom and sweep the street leading to your house, from beginning to end. Whenever you are home, your house, from beginning to end, Whenever you are home, you are home, you must sweep the street. If you are not home, then it is a different story. But try to sweep at least once a week, if gibing is called giving will effort
 
In the olden days, there were many was to give. There was one method that everyone practiced, but which we do not see performed much these days. Traditionally, in front of every Home there would be a big water basin with a scooper or a cup next to it. If a passerby was thirsty, he could quench his thirst.
 
A simple water basin becomes a basin of value, converting plain water into a gesture of kindness.
 
Therefore, if parents practice giving and observing the Precepts themselves, along with good manners and virtues, then their children will live in a wonderful environment. Then the family will not have to move anywhere.
 
 

     
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